plan a wedding renewal
It's interesting:"I know they have both put a tremendous amount of effort in to the planning of this wedding, and can only hope that, apart from this speech, everything has ..."
There are a wide variety of reasons why someone may want a "do-over" of their wedding day. Maybe your wedding didn't turn out the way you wanted it. Maybe something important was missing. Perhaps you just want to reaffirm your commitment. In a culture where divorce occurs much more frequently than silver wedding anniversaries, the renewal can be an especially meaningful event for you and your family. Renewals are a bit different than traditional weddings. The planning process is a bit different as are the rules of etiquette.
Things You'll Need
- Strong marriage
Instructions
1
Make a list of anything that you would have liked to change about your wedding day. So, you eloped to Vegas the first time around and none of your family or friends got to celebrate your union. Maybe you and your fiance were broke youngsters and you never got the big party of your dreams. Perhaps religion has grown more important to you than it was when you first got married and you're yearning for a church ceremony. This is your chance to make your unfulfilled wedding day dreams come true. Maybe your wedding day was perfect but you want to celebrate a big anniversary with a reaffirmation of your love and commitment to one another. Whatever the reasons and circumstances, let your imagination wander and make your plans meaningful for you and your partner.
2
Talk to your partner about what he wants. Chances are, you've made it this far in your marriage because you communicate well with one another. Don't stop now. Many men are uninvolved in the wedding-planning process. This doesn't mean that they don't have any opinions or desires about their wedding day. Maybe your husband really wanted to get married in the church he grew up in but, for whatever reason, you got married in your church instead. Maybe you had a huge, traditional wedding but he would have preferred something more intimate and personal. Discuss the scope of the event, as well as how much money you will both be comfortable spending on it.
3
Talk to friends and family members if their input will influence your decisions. If the presence of one or more friends and family is one of the things you were missing the first time around, make sure they won't miss the encore. If your father couldn't walk you down the aisle the first time, don't plan the renewal for a day when he has to be out of town on a business trip. Some couples opt to do a renewal to coincide with the marriage or anniversary of another family member. While some people may view this as a nice tribute to them, others may feel that you are stealing their thunder. Talk to the couple whose day you are planning to share and get their honest feelings on the matter before you proceed.
4
Realize that a vow renewal is not the same thing as a wedding and act accordingly. There are two schools of thought on the matter of wedding-related etiquette. Some feel that it is important to follow the rules, while others think they should have whatever they want, no matter what others think. Regardless of your position, be aware of the proprieties of the wedding renewal. Renewal rules are much the same as those for second marriages. Don't wear a formal white dress or a veil. The renewal is much more of a casual event than a wedding. Most women opt for a nice suit or simple dress in a pastel color. Don't expect friends and family to throw you a shower or a bachelorette party. These events are reserved for first-time brides. Furthermore, registering for gifts is considered extremely tacky. It is assumed that your household is already well-equipped, so the established couple should not accept gifts for their renewal. Finally, plan to cover all of your expenses yourselves. Parents often cover all or most of the wedding-day expenses, but this is not a wedding. A married couple should never ask their families to foot the bill for their renewal.
5
Keep the focus on your love, commitment and the life that you have built as a mature couple. You may want to incorporate some meaningful items or traditions from your wedding day into the renewal celebration, but resist the urge to completely re-create it. You have grown as people and as a couple. Your renewal should be a reflection of how far you have come. Look to the present and future rather than the past. The renewal can be an inspiration to others and an especially meaningful lesson for younger guests. Include children and grandchildren in any way possible. You may also want to do something to honor your married guests such as a special toast, dance or prayer.
Tips &- Warnings
Plan ahead as far in advance as possible to increase the chance that everyone on your guest list will be able to attend.
The cost of a renewal can spiral out of control just as quickly as wedding expenses. Plan a budget early on and stick to it.
Tags: Maybe your, your wedding, first time, friends family, wedding renewal, couple should, especially meaningfulSource: www.ehow.com
