Wedding announcement etiquette for step-parents

It's interesting:
"At the wedding rehearsal yesterday evening, I had the pleasure of talking with Linda’s close friends. They talked about how she’s the friend they turn to when they need to vent over a foolish boyfriend or for advice on land the job of their dreams. They also said she has some pretty sweet moves on the dance floor. So let’s see them!"

Weddings are supposed to be wonderful, happy occasions, but unfortunately many people let small details get in the way of the celebration, such as the wording on wedding announcements. This is common in families where the bride or groom (or both) have step-parents. If you are the step-parent of someone who is getting married, there are several rules of etiquette to keep in mind concerning wedding announcements.

1. Traditional Wording

   • Wedding announcements are traditionally used by couples who decide to elope or who are having a small or private wedding that most of their friends and family are not invited to. Announcements are sent after the marriage, and are not invitations to a wedding or ceremony. Traditionally, a wedding announcement contains the names of the bride and groom, as well as their parents--this is where things can be a bit tricky, as step-parents are not traditionally put on wedding announcements. The following is an example of the traditional way to word a wedding announcement when the parents are divorced: &ldquo-Mr. Donald Wiseman and Ms. Patricia Wiseman, along with Harrold and Irene McDonald are honored to announce the marriage of Brenda Wiseman and Troy McDonald.&rdquo-

   Simple Announcement Wording

   • The easiest way for wedding announcements to not hurt any feelings or cause potential problems between step-families is to leave all mention of parents and step-parents off of them. This tends to work best when the engaged couple is paying for their own wedding. For example, the wedding announcements could read: &ldquo-Brenda Wiseman and Troy McDonald invite you to celebrate their marriage, on July 24, 2011.&rdquo-

   Including Everyone

   • If your step-child and fiancee are fine with it, include all parents on the wedding announcements. This is another way to avoid hurt feelings and conflict, which can happen if you are close with your step-child but end up left off their wedding announcements. Here's an example in this scenario: &ldquo-Mr. and Mrs. Donald Wiseman and Ms. Patricia Wiseman, along with Harrold and Irene McDonald joyously announce the marriage of Brenda Wiseman and Troy McDonald.&rdquo-

   Considering Money

   • When deciding whether or not you as a step-parent should be included on the wedding announcements, keep in mind just who is paying for the wedding. If you and your spouse are paying, it is reasonable to want to be included in the wording. However, if your step-child's other parent and their partner are footing the bill, you don't have much reason to complain about being left off the announcement, unless you and your step-child are particularly close.

   Being Understanding

   • No matter what names are on the invitation or who is paying for the wedding, keep one thing in mind: it is your step-child's wedding day, not yours. You don't want to look back on this event and think about how petty it was for you and your step-child's other parents to argue about what was typed on a piece of paper. If you must bring up the subject of having your name on the announcements, do it in a non-confrontational way, and bring up alternatives so that everyone can be satisfied.

   Dos and Don'ts

   • Do make sure to congratulate your step-child on his nuptials, support him during wedding preparations, and lend financial support for the wedding if possible, whether or not your name appears on the invitations. There are plenty of things that you as a step-parent should not do: keep harping about the wording of the announcements during the wedding preparations and after the wedding is over- refuse to attend the wedding because the wording on the announcements is not to your liking- pick a fight with your step-child's other set of parents or your spouse- burden your step-child with the ultimatum of choosing only one set of parents to put on the announcements.

Source: www.ehow.com

Tags: your step-child, wedding announcements, step-child other, Troy McDonald, Wiseman Troy